Eight LONG Years!

Most of you probably already know that I clean houses for a living. I have cut back a lot recently due to my health and am now only cleaning two houses a week~compared to 5-6 a week. Cutting back has helped some but I honestly think I need a change. I went to physical therapy yesterday and my regular Dr. today and they BOTH suggested a change in my career! The therapist said she thinks I have the worst job for my health! The Dr. suggested maybe going back to school or finding an easier job. I have been cleaning for eight years as of next week and my body is DONE!

The problem is, I don't know where to go from here. I have spent the last 20 years raising children and being self-employed either babysitting or cleaning. The last 'real' job I had was at a bank right before I started cleaning. So, I don't have a lot (or any) experience with all the computer stuff I might need to get a good part time job. Another problem is that I can make more money in less time by cleaning than I could make working part time somewhere. I like being my own boss and making my own schedule. What I DON'T like is what it does to my body!

I am certified to teach yoga, but that is not really an option until I get my chronic myofascial pain under control. It is improving, but not to the point that I would feel comfortable teaching yoga. I guess I really need to pray about what to do. Do I be patient and wait to be able to teach yoga, or do I look for a part time job doing who knows what? Have any of you ever gone back to work after years of not working~for someone else that is? I would love to hear your thoughts:)


In other news, I am back on Savella. I had said before that I was NOT going to take it again, but after talking with my Dr., I have decided to give it one more shot. He assured me that the weak feeling should go away, but it may take a month or two. So, no more Naltrexone~which means I can take pain meds. when needed:)

Hope you are all well! I have been blog reading some, but just haven't been much in the computer mood lately:) Thanks for stopping by!

Need to Clean it up a Bit

Over the years, I have read LOTS of diet and health books~and I do mean LOTS! Right now I'm reading a book called 'Why We Hurt'. It's not a diet book, but he does talk a lot about how diet can affect our health in positive or not so positive ways. I have probably been on every diet known to mankind, either trying to lose weight or trying to feel better. I haven't really found a specific diet to help with fibro. and I don't think there is one out there. What I DO know, is that eating good, whole, clean foods is best for overall health. It seems like no matter what you read about health, eating whole foods is a common theme. It doesn't matter if you are reading about grain free, low-fat, vegan or whatever. I think most people would agree that whole foods are best regardless of what type of diet you follow. Now, of course, that doesn't mean that we all eat the foods we should. Our taste buds crave all kinds of sugary, processed foods. Our taste buds can be our worst enemies!

The more I read about the benefits of eating whole foods, the more I realize, I'm not doing a very good job at it. You may be asking what a whole food is. Well, it's whole grain oats (the slow cooking kind) instead of boxed cereal. That is just one example. The more a food is 'messed' with before it gets to your table, the less whole it is. Lately, I have been feeling like I am eating way too many processed grains: blue corn chips, gluten free bread, rice pasta, gluten free crackers and cookies. Thankfully, my body starts letting me know that it wants REAL food, like veggies and fruit! The more processed food we eat, the more we usually want.

I have gotten bored with food and have not been motivated to cook. I found myself yesterday wanting a BIG yummy salad, but didn't feel like fixing it and didn't have much on hand to make it an interesting salad. So, what did I eat instead: a sandwich on gluten free bread with blue corn chips on the side. Then I went searching for dessert, but didn't have any. 

I am hoping that today, I will have the motivation to eat more things like this:

Black bean burger with sweet potato

fresh peaches

salad with edamame

green smoothie

These are the kinds of foods that I want to be eating! They do make me feel better than processed food! So, why am I not eating like this? I need to go to the store and I have been lazy about my food choices. How about you, are there any food choices you need to work on?

By the way, that workout yesterday~GOT ME!! More on that another day. Let's just say, I need to learn moderation!! I'm off to physical therapy and will most likely get lectured about overdoing it! Have a great day!

We'll See...

Do you like to exercise? I DO!! About 12-13 years ago I learned to love exercise for the first time in my life. I had three young children and had some weight leftover from pregnancy that I wanted to lose. So, I learned to exercise and found that it made me feel really good. My main form of exercise has changed over the years from one thing to another, but I have been pretty consistent with doing something. I have done FIRM workouts a LOT along with some other videos I had. I never had a gym membership and didn't see the need for one. Over the last few years, my main form of exercise has been lots of walking and cleaning houses for a living. Then, almost two years ago I added yoga to my list of favorites. I also have a history with some dance.

When my fibro. became full blown about 8 months ago, my ability to exercise was greatly challenged. I found it very difficult to do even the simplest things that I used to love to do! I think this has been one of the hardest parts of fibro. and chronic fatigue. Right now, my physical therapist isn't recommending that I do anything other than some walking~which I tend to even overdo that. In a nutshell, not being able to exercise like I have in the past is driving me CRAZY!! My brain wants to do so much more!! So, today I walked on the treadmill for about 20 minutes and then decided I wanted to try to do some of this:

This is the New York City Ballet workout that I used to do a LOT. I have used the book so much that it is literally falling apart! I did refrain from doing the whole thing though. It felt SO good! I did the ab exercises (most of them) and the floor exercises. I can not lay flat on my back, so I made sure I put a pillow under my head to support my neck. My PT had me have x-rays of my neck recently and there are some issues that were concerning, so I have to be pretty careful.

Anyway, I am just really praying that what I did today will not aggravate my body! Sometimes I don't realize I've overdone it until it's too late~like the time I tried to do P90X~not the smartest decision I've ever made. I just want to find something that I can do that won't hurt me! I feel like I am losing a lot of muscle and turning into a blob of flab! Will my body be able to handle a ballet workout? I guess we'll see~

HOORAY!!!!!

What's all the excitement about? Well, my son FINALLY got a car!! Do you know what this means? Let me just paint the picture for you. He is 18 and in college classes 5 days a week and two nights a week. He has a girlfriend that lives about 30 minutes from our house and she doesn't have a car either. I work two days a week and have physical therapy usually two days a week, not to mention grocery shopping etc. So, you can imagine how tricky it has been to get my son where he needs to be at the same time I need to be somewhere. Talk about stressful! I am excited beyond belief that this stress has been lifted off of me!

My kids don't seem to understand that even driving around here and there can be exhausting for someone like me. Like, they REALLY don't get it. I know it has been hard for them to understand why I have such a hard time doing certain things or being on the go all the time. Now, I will be able to be home more instead of going out every single day~woohoo!! There is also the fact that sometimes I would let my son take my car but then that meant if I did NEED to go somewhere, I couldn't. So happy that the problem is solved and he can take his own car to school, work and dating:)

As a follow up to my post yesterday, I have decided to stay on naltrexone, at least until I can talk to my Dr. again. I am trying 5-HTP again and praying that I will feel the benefits from that. No more Savella! I took one dose yesterday morning, but none after that and I can already tell a difference in how weak I was feeling. I didn't sleep well at all last night though, but at least I don't have to run my son everywhere!:) Did I mention that I'm excited about that?!

By the way, sorry I'm not too on top of putting pictures in my post, but I decided when I started this blog that I would not let picureless post keep me from blogging if I felt like blogging:) Have a great day!

Oh, I Forgot About That!

I know it's been a while since I have posted, but I wanted to talk a bit about being on Naltrexone vs. Savella. I have been on Naltrexone for barely over a month and the main difference I can tell is having a bit more energy. While that is a VERY good thing, it hasn't helped with pain at all. My Dr. said it could take a couple of months before we will know if it is going to work for me. The HUGE downfall to being on Naltrexone is that while being on it, I can't take any kind of pain meds. I can take things like Aleve, but that honestly does NOTHING for my pain. There have been many times over this last month that I would have given my left arm for some strong drugs! Not really, but you get the idea:)

Another downfall to being on Naltrexone is that is does NOTHING for depression. People who are not chronically ill may not understand this, but hurting pretty much all the time and being tired all the time can get pretty depressing! I realized the other day that I was tempted to voluntarily drive my car into a concrete wall! I know~NOT a good way to be thinking! I thought at least I could just lay in a hospital bed and be pumped full of morhine~oh, but wait, I couldn't do that because morphine and Naltrexone would not mix!! Then on top of being hurt, depressed and lying in a hospital bed, I would also be puking my guts up. I decided that was not a good option:) I don't really want to drive into a concrete wall, but I DO want some relief from pain and depression!

After having terribly wrong thinking, I decided maybe I better go back on the Savella. At least it would help with the depression and I could take pain meds. when I need them (after going off Naltrexone). I started Savella back on Friday, but there is something I forgot about when taking it. Yeah, it makes me a little sick at first, but I can handle that.What I can't handle is how weak I feel. I had completely forgotten that I felt like this when I was on it before! I'm talking weak to the point that when I get out of the shower, I have to sit on the toilet seat just to catch my breath and not feel like I'm gonna pass out! I'm talking weak to the point that walking from one end of the house to the other is exhausting~ and I have a small house! I am always tired, but this is a different kind of tired and it only got worse the longer I was on the Savella. How could I have forgotten that?! Well, probably because I was never sure if it was the Savella causing it. I just chalked it up as normal Chronic Fatigue but after being off of it and then starting it back, I now know it is the Savella.

Now what? I think I'm between a rock and a hard place! Now I'm thinking maybe I should just give the Naltrexone more time. But what about the depression? I don't know. I really don't like the idea of trying yet another medication. I have used 5-HTP for depression in the past and may give that another shot. In the meantime, I will continue to do my best to trust God. There have been a lot of things in my life that I have not understood and this is one of them, but I WILL keep going to God! He is my only hope of any kind of peace in the midst of my circumstances. I NEED HIM!! Sometimes I feel like He is right in front of me, but I'm having trouble 'seeing' Him. This is when I have to choose to simply trust:)

Myofascial Pain

It's amazing what you learn when your health is on the blink! I am learning all sorts of things I didn't know about muscles and what is called the fascia. A lot of people with Fibromyalgia also have Myofascial pain, but they are not the same kind of pain. I went to physical therapy yesterday specifically for myofascial pain relief and feel like I have a little better understanding of what is going on in my body. You can read a brief explanation of myofascial pain here. I would probably butcher any explanation I could give, so you are better off reading up on it yourself if interested:) All I can say is that it HURTS!! The physical therapy hurt, but it was kind of a good hurt~if that makes any sense. She told me I would probably be sore afterwards and she was right! She also said that what she did on me was 'light' because she didn't want to hurt me even more. If that was light, I would have died from whatever she considers 'heavy'. Don't get me wrong, I trust her in that what she did will eventually help, it's just that sometimes things may feel worse before they get better. I really did like the therapist and she was very knowledgeable. I will be seeing her once a week as well as another therapist that I have already been seeing for a while.

Due to having a better understanding of myofascial pain, I also now have a better understanding as to why I CAN NOT do yoga! Myofascial pain can NOT be stretched out! It has to be released or manipulated by someone else. That explains why every time I would try to stretch to relieve my pain, it would only make it worse! This gives me hope that after some time with therapy, I will be able to do yoga again! I don't know how long it will take, but if I'm learning anything through illness, it's to be patient. Both of the therapist that I see are recommending that I not do any kind of exercise other than swimming for a while. So, I am going to a warm water therapy pool today and I CAN'T WAIT!!! See, there are some good things that come from having limitations:)

The Longest Dr. Visit of my Life!

I have been meaning to post an update of my latest Dr. appointment and just haven't had time to sit down and do it! Anyway, last Monday I went to a new Dr. for my fibromyalgia and some other health issues that I have been struggling with for a LONG time. I went with a dear friend from my church, who also has fibro. I spent the night at her house the night before because it was a 2-1/2 hour drive and we had to be there by 8:30. We packed our food for the day and headed out bright and EARLY that morning~and it was COLD! I don't like early or cold:)

The first thing they did when I got there was take blood. Then they let me eat my breakfast~yay! I had the most complete physical I have ever had in my life! After the physical exam, we spent the rest of the day (literally!) talking about the best course of action for me. I have never had a Dr. that asked so many questions and spent so long explaining things. As we were talking, he would sometimes just stop and THINK! Most Dr.s spend about 10 minutes with you and then hand you a prescription and send you on your way. Don't get me wrong, I still really like my regular Dr. and he DOES take time to listen to me, but most Dr.s I have been to are not like that.

Anyway, this new Dr. put a LOT of thought into what would be best for me. I also liked him because he is an MD but he also does alternative therapies. He tries to keep things as natural as possible and I appreciate that:)

So, here's the scoop~
1~He changed my hormones that I was on. I had been on Vagifem for a while without much (if any) success and he changed me to a natural Estriol cream. Estriol is the safest of the three types of estrogen. I was using the Vagifem 3 nights a week and now I am using Estriol twice a day! I have had SERIOUS female issues for the last 2 yrs. and 4 months and he is hoping this will help. He also has me using a natural progesterone cream twice a day. Then, a couple of days ago, he called to tell me that my testosterone is low for my age so now I am waiting to get that shipped to me. He uses a pharmacy in Alabama for all hormones because he feels like the quality is best from them. I am just so happy that all these hormones are bio-identical/natural:)

2~He changed my diet! Oh boy, that one is HARD! I am gluten free, dairy free, completely sugar free (not even stevia for a while), grain free and low-oxalate! Talk about a little overwhelmed! He also wants me to only eat every 5 hours. I thought that would be really hard, but as long as I eat like he told me too, I am very satisfied. He stressed to NOT eat a low fat diet and to make sure I get adequate protein for my weight. He also stressed the importance of eating good clean meat~like grass fed etc. Good thing we have deer meat in the freezer. You can't get much cleaner than that:) I am going to start blogging at Living Free again just to have a place to share my meals/ideas etc. on such a restricted diet. Hope you'll come on over and visit me there too!

3~He changed me from Savella to low dose Naltrexone. I am totally off of the Savella now and just started the Naltrexone last night. You can read up on low dose Naltrexone here. I am also taking several vitamins/supplements and probiotics. I thought it was interesting that he said that you can't truly be healthy unless you have a healthy gut! I haven't had a healthy gut for years, but I feel like we are on the right track. I feel good about changing medicine because I feel like if he is willing to prescribe a 'drug', then he must feel it is pretty safe. I have read some testimonies from people who have tried Naltrexone and had good results so I am hopeful:)

I know this was a really long update, so I'll close now:) I will still be posting here about health stuff, but will also be posting at my old blog about yummy food stuff! My friend and I laugh because we can't ever talk to each other without talking about FOOD at some point:) Living Free is a place where I can do that too.

Hope you are all having a blessed week!